by

Theodore The JokeSter
(The JokeSter)

Now here's a guy that never visited the Zen of Tracking pages :) [http://www.hornet.org/info/zentrack]. Panning is non-existent, and no less than 8 tracks are used up for percussion that only needed two - and that's just the start of it. By order 0C it reaches cacophonic levels, with a percussive melody which goes horribly wrong. A quarter of the way through the tune the pace of the tune is doubled. However, even in the style it's trying to cover - which I assume to be hardcore/gabber - the song fails because the drums are simply too weak. I would ask the composer exactly what he would do if this song were being played on a loud set of speakers in a room filled with people; it's undanceable, a pain to listen to and a musical waste of time (sorry to sound harsh). GOOD minimalistic techno - remember, your tune is essentially just drums - has its true merits in the technical side, where this track falls flat on its face.

Egad one listening was enought for this song. Ouch, it's just an annoying song, while I can see _some_ effort there is definatelly no skills. There is _way_ too much going on, and way too many channels used. Until order 24 it is bearable but after that it's a waste of time. Also there is no real need for so many samples, only one clap instrument would have surficed for this usage. Samples 1, 3 and 4 appear to have intestinal related origins also. This author either has a long way to go to make decent songs or entered this as a joke imho.

The beginning pattern shows promise, but then the piece drops down to the generic dance beat. The beat samples are interesing. Sounds like a kid with a chopstick banging pots and pans as fast as he can. Weird music. The title reminds me of the movie "mr. bean". The bass drum near the ends builds up, but then dies away? WTF? Go out with a bang! No climax man, you just get soft.

You know, I never really liked beans, but I was forced to eat them as a kid; just as I seem to be forced to listen to this son...er, uh, XM file. You successfully mastered the art of filling up 32 channels worth of noise, congratulations! You also win the award for most repetitions of a single pattern. You may want to think about speeding the tempo up a lot, in order to make the pain go away quicker. In closing, enjoy your beans.

Amazing, finally a song that IT can barely play but FT can. Reminds me of industrial noise, something Skinny Puppy would try to experiment on but never dare publish. Very original. Yet, imho, this track fails to show the tracker's true talent. Yes, there were some highlights - if you wanted industrial noise, you were successful. Overall, I eventually got annoyed by the song - and I listen to industrial.

This has to be a joke song. It looks like a joke song, it feels like a joke song, it sounds like a joke song. However, if that's not the case, I sincerely apologize. (Disclaimer: Emergency Vote!)

Ok, so when's the song going to start? Lots of channels and - no music. Very difficult to make creative comments, or even point out "good" and "bad" things. Well, there was this one part where all the channels were playing the same thing and then gave way to another thing, one by one, I haven't seen that before so I guess it was original. And good quality samples too.